movember: when men are gross for a good cause

Awwww… the smell of disintegrating pumpkins fills the air as fall winds down and the month of November rolls in. Along with the cold, wet rain/snow crap, darker days and lack of sunshine rustles in a new kind of ugly: moustaches.

November has come to be called MOvember as part of a men’s cancer fundraising campaign that a growing number of men participate in year by year. Personally, I think it’s awesome.

Movember confirms my long-held belief that all millennial guys harbour the strong desire to grow robust, “distinguished,” upper lip shrubbery thus confirming their masculinity. The problem is that moustaches went out of style about the time they were born. The Movember campaign is actually INGENIOUS because it offers a socially-acceptable format to showcase one’s moustache for a brief month without the negative ‘stache stigma. These men get to live out Bert Reynold fantasies AND be part of a good cause.

I am one lucky lady.

During Howie’s bi-monthly shave last week he left behind a truly disturbing stache in pure Gunther style. I dared him to leave it on for a day. He wouldn’t. Howie still has not been able to get over the stigma of staches but I hope someday I will be lucky enough to come home to that stache every day in the month of November. Until then, we are choosing to support our friends Geoff Kooymans and Bryan Vanderlugt.

Ladies, I agree. Moustaches are not the most appealing thing, but I say let’s indulge this good cause, and raise money for the men in our lives donating their upper lips for prostate cancer and other men’s related diseases. The outpouring of support they show for women’s cancer research is astonishing. It’s time we give back.

I’ve heard whisperings of women’s cervical cancer groups that wanted to create their own spin on Movember. Only instead of growing out their upper lip hair, they are growing out their… erm… more delicate regions. I have a few problems with this:

  1. What is the point of growing out hair that is illegal to showcase in public? You will literally get arrested if you want to show your supporters how their donations have made your …erm… growth possible.
  2. How would women even go about asking for donations? I can’t even imagine a more awkward conversation. I would rather be the 10 year old girl whose parents trapped her on a car ride so they tell her all about pubescent changes than ask for this kind of donation.
  3. Ladies, can’t the guys just have this one? I mean, I’m all for equality but do we need to do EVERYTHING they do? Just let them have Movember. We don’t need to create a counterpart. If you REALLY want to get into it donate to one of the fine lads or stop bleaching your upper lip for a month.

Good luck gentlemen, may the ‘stache be with you!


One thought on “movember: when men are gross for a good cause

  1. LOL He should have left it!! Maybe you can talk him into it for next year…or the year after…

    We do NOT need a women’s equivalent. JUST STOP IT cervical cancer peoples!!



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